The Boys

"Come over to my pad."

Girl Pride!

My ears will freeze today because my head is too swollen with pride to get a hat on it after Parent-Teacher Conferences yesterday.

Caroline, my 4th grader, was thanked by her teacher over and over again for not getting involved in the "girl drama" and for always being kind to everyone. I was saddened to hear that the girl drama has started already in the 4th grade. My life was plagued with it for so long, I'd consider homeschooling my kids to keep them from having to endure it! (and that's saying a LOT!) But it seems that Caroline is handling it well, and in the meantime is making straight A's and has a boatload of friends.

Eliza's teacher showed us Eliza's First Grade Journal, and I had to clamp down on my lips with my teeth to keep from laughing out loud at the things she writes. The kid is hilarious. And it warmed my heart to see that all the pictures of her family and her home were happy, smiley, loving representations. (Whew!)

Her teacher noted on her last report card that sometimes Eliza doesn't pay attention in class. But she said yesterday that she may be wrong. That maybe Eliza just looks like she's not listening, but really is, since she doesn't seem to ever have missed anything.

Those are my girls. Thanks for allowing me to indulge in a little pride!!

God has been so good to us!

Don't they look like perfect, innocent children? Who never get into mischief?

Artsy Fartsy

For the last several years, well ever since I heard about it, I have wanted to go to an artists' retreat called Art Fest, which is held every spring in Port Townsend, Washington. I bring it up every year to my husband, who. like most men, doesn't get hints. He often doesn't get clear suggestions. It takes a physical blow or something like it for an idea to sink in, especially when it is one that requires change in his routine or money from his account.

So, while we were out for Thai food a few weeks ago, I decided it was time for my annual Bring-Up-Art-Fest conversation. Lo and behold, y'all, he said, "I think you should just go."

I said, "Excuse me? Do you have any idea how much it's gonna cost? After I pay for the classes and lodging and then meals and supplies and travel...it's gonna be more than a thousand bucks." He responded (God love him!), "Well, if I had the chance to go to Alaska to catch salmon, I'd go; and it would cost a whole lot more than a thousand bucks!"

I love this man!

So, I started choosing what classes I'm going to take and figuring out if I should drive the 13 hours or spend a few hundred more to fly. That's when I was feeling a little lonely about it. I mean, why doesn't god give me a friend or two who enjoy creating? All my friends are badass athletes or would never leave their families or have no extra money...none would do what it takes to join me for Art Fest.

But I do have one wacky, zany friend who loves to create. She is a single mom, though, so a lot of obstacles are there for her, but she is at least spontaneous.

I though of her immediately when I saw on a blog that there was an essay context and the winner gets a free trip to Art Fest. I called said wacky friend and told her about it. She called me back 10 minutes later and said she wrote up something and sent it in.

Well...she won! so we are going to Art Fest!!!!!

Today we are going to get together and try to come up with cool little knick knacks to join in the trading that goes on among the participants. I love the feeling of excitement building, getting my stuff organized and ready for something fun.

My one concern is that I will come back form this event and want to quit my job and be a full time artist.

It could happen.

REY RAY

This is Caroline and Eliza with Macho Rey Ray del Mundo...our new Havanese puppy.

I took Rey Ray to his first puppy class last week, and it was just so cute. A room full of puppies, what would be cuter? Even the most Machismo would use the word "cute" in that room.

So we got started by trying to settle all the pups down so that we could move on with the other things we were there to learn. Rey Ray sat there and looked sweet as pie. I was proud, but a little suspicious...Was he working up a BM? Was he waiting to pounce?

Then we put on their leashes and walked them around the room. A little black lab was howling and yanking on his chain, just as cute as could be. A little Beagle-Poo was cutting flips on his leash, round and round. Two Australian Shepherds were hopping and nipping.

Rey Ray walked nearly perfectly on his leash. Then he sat when I asked him to sit. He allowed the instructors to approach him. At one point a man watching us said to me, "Your puppy should be teaching the others how to behave."

I just smiled and said "thank you" as if this behavior from Rey Ray was normal. Right now he is barking his head off at JEB, who just won't play with him. And every now and then he gets tired of that and attacks the nearest anything, going in for kill. When I try to settle him down, he starts trying to bite my face off and climb on top of my head to get away. All this after he recently went poo and then ate it.

But the people at Puppy Class think Rey Ray rocks!

I'm Fed Up!

Okay, I'm just down right done!

I have struggled with anxiety and panic attacks now for nearly six years, and I'm just over it.

I recently picked up Beth Moore's newest book, "So Long Insecurity," and I've decided that I'm gong to really believe what I believe. I'm going to go through what Beth Moore recommends in this book, and I am going to continue to study the Word of God and pray scripture about this thing...I'm going to bind up this anxious spirit once and for all...so it better get ready!

I am taking a new medication that is working really well, except for the fact that I'm eating everything in sight and my hair is falling out. If you have ever had a panic attack, you know that you'd rather be fat and bald than suffer the effects of the panic. But what if you didn't have to trade your peace of mind for your ...well...peace of mind?

God says that He does not give me the "spirit of fear, but of power and love and of a sound mind."

I'm ready to claim it!

Our Beautiful Ballerina

Caroline's First Real Valentine

This is Caroline writing in the first real Valentine, which she gave to her first real crush.

Art Fest, Here I Come!

I'm finally going to Art Fest!

And I am so excited to get together with artist from all over and play and learn and laugh together in Port Townsend, Washington.

Go here and check it out:

http://www.teeshaslandofodd.com/artfest/info.html

Healing Rooms

Yesterday I went to check out a new place in Helena called the Healing Rooms. It is a place anyone can go for prayer and healing. I was afraid of it for a long time, but when I found out that it was a legitimate, Bible-based ministry, I decided to give it a try.

On the form they gave me when I first entered, I asked for prayer for the anxiety that I've been struggling with for the last six years. Then they take the form into a prayer room, cover it so the people praying don't know who it is or what it is about. They pray for God to give them a Word about the person. After my form was prayed over, they came and escorted me to the prayer room where three people anointed me with oil and laid their hands on me and began praying.

The first woman said that God gave her the scripture Psalm 27:1-3, which says:

¹ The LORD is my light and my salvation—whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life—of whom shall I be afraid? ² When evil men advance against me to devour my flesh,when my enemies and my foes attack me, they will stumble and fall.³ Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then will I be confident.

Then she prayed away the enemy and the anxiety in the name of Jesus.

The second woman said God gave her a vision of a huge crop of corn -- corn with large, tall stalks. I looked at her completely puzzled, because it didn't really mean anything to me. (I thought of a certain strain of blue corn found by an ancestor of mine, which my father has continued to harvest and purify, but I couldn't find a connection.) She said to her it meant abundance and she went on to talk about the abundance I have in God, my abundant personality, etc. Then she said God gave her a vision of the Holy Spirit "trickling down" into the dry spots of my life. She said, "Then look out because behind it is a flood of love."

The third person praying was a man who said God showed him to put the sign of the cross on my hands and my forehead because everyone I come in contact with will see His light shine through me. He said I will affect many generations for Christ. He also told me that he sees an abundance of joy in me and that he had a vision of me skipping. Yes, skipping.

So, I don't know what all of this means, if anything, I just thought I'd share it with you.

Mom is Welcome!

This is the chalk board on the door to Caroline's room. In case you can't read it, it says, "Caroline's Room - I just need some quiet time with God. Mom can come in."

Ah, I love Caroline being 10. She WANTS her mom in her room. I'm going to enjoy this as long as it lasts!

The Mommy Balance

A mother's life is a constant struggle to find balance.

All I did was add exercising back into my life the last few months, and it feels like I can't get anything else accomplished. I feel better. I need to do it, to keep osteoporosis away, as well as other diseases that come from being sedentary, but that few hours in a week seems to be pushing me over the edge of my to-do list limit.

I have considered quitting my part-time job and just volunteering a few hours there a week. But I truly have a vision for the pregnancy center and I have already seen the difference we make there and I don't want to leave it in the hands of someone else. And anyway, I have always felt like God called me to this work.

So, like all mothers, I'm back to trying to find the balance where I can be my best both at home and at work. To make the most of the short time I have with my little girls. It takes focus and creativity; and while I sometimes lack focus, I make up for it in creativity.

This summer the girls and I can exercise together outside. For now I squeeze it in when it least affects them. And I try to hit the grocery when they are in their dance and theatre classes.

And my amazing husband has given me a gift this week. He is going to take the girls to our river house and leave me home for some quiet alone time. Hallelujah!

Don't call me. I'm turning off the phones.